she kept yelling 'call me bella'
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
