The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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