Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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