If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
