That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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