To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
