he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
