do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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