no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
