my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
