It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
