I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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