Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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