You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
a search helicopter?!
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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