Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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