Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
