There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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