I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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