Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
