I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
