Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
