Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
