First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
