3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
