So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
