just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
