Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
