i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
