Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
