I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
