you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
