A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
wow bdsm is so cute
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
