You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
