Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Found your dick twin last night
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
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