Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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