We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
