cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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