she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
