Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
PS: I just woke up from my shower
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Randomize