The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
