Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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