Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
