I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
