I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Randomize
