What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
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