i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
