then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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