i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
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