is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
