sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
